Self-confidence is not an innate quality. You are not born with it, and you don’t wake up one day feeling like Dwayne Johnson.
As such, the only way to become more confident at work and in your personal life is with organic growth. In other words, you have to build your self-confidence one step at a time.
That’s where the following habits come into play.
How to increase your self-confidence organically
By living your life according to self-defined principles, finding the right mentors, putting yourself in a confidence-building environment, and working on your mental and physical shape, you can form a confident personality.
On this basis, here are six killer ways to increase your self-confidence organically.
Adopt a catalog of values and live accordingly
The first step toward becoming more confident is to stop making decisions in line with external factors.
I need to major in that subject because my family expects me to. That job is right for me because the market is favorable in my city. And I shouldn’t date a foreigner because it might be difficult for him or her to assimilate here.
In plain English, these are the thinking patterns that shatter your self-confidence. If you don’t trust yourself in the context of making critical calls, you’ll always struggle with self-esteem.
That’s where you need a catalog of values.
To become confident in life, you need to know the why of your decisions. And personal values form the most resilient mental framework when it comes to making tough decisions. Better still, they will help you set priorities and combine those with daily habits.
As such, if you act according to personal values – like entrepreneurship, fairness, or sustainability – you’ll have a justification for actions, and you’ll be able to argue your case. In that same vein, you won’t fall victim to external influences that hinder crucial decisions in your life.
Identify the right voices to listen to
Personal values are the bread and butter of confident decisions, but you can’t do everything alone. Sometimes, you need counsel, and it’s essential to curate your advice.
To boost your self-confidence, you need to identify the right voices to listen to.
In the words of Inc Magazine:
“We all need someone who believes we can achieve our goals. Identify that person, friend, partner, or mentor. When you can’t believe in yourself – and everyone has those times – go spend some time with the people who can.”
It can be a childhood friend, a coworker, or a family member. The essential point is that the people who give you advice productively foster your self-confidence. What do I mean by that?
Simple, listen to voices that both encourage and constructively criticize you. If you want to increase your self-confidence organically, you need a combination of positive and negative feedback.
The positive part will spur you on and fuel your confidence-building journey. The negative feedback, on the other hand, will help you stay on track and avoid over-confidence.
Finding people who can act as confidence-building mentors is challenging but worth the struggle.
In contrast, you also need to filter out all the feedback that doesn’t support your confidence-increasing efforts. That doesn’t mean cutting all ties to former friends and colleagues who don’t fit your criteria. It simply involves opening your ears when the feedback channels your confidence and closing them for everything else.
Go to inspiring places
The environment often plays a central role when it comes to building self-confidence.
Many people spend their entire life in the same city, surrounded by the same people, following the same rituals. And while there is nothing inherently wrong with that, it can hinder your self-confidence.
If you feel unsure about yourself, your projects, or your ideas, it’s sometimes best to jump into the cold water.
In this context, I remember the period after quitting my job. I had started my foray into freelance writing and was planning to become a digital nomad. I wasn’t the most confident person in the world – and my freelance career was still in its infancy. Tangent to this, I made lots of business mistakes in the beginning and faced financial anxiety.
After selling most of my possessions and traveling one-way to Bangkok, however, my mindset changed.
The hustle and bustle of the Thai capital and the knowledge that I was now my own boss turned a switch in my mind. I hadn’t achieved anything yet, but I knew that I was on the right path. A radical change of environment had kick-started my confidence-building journey, and from here on, I became more and more sure of myself.
Work on your body posture, fitness, and body language
There is no denying that building self-confidence goes hand in hand with improving the image you have of yourself.
In other words, if you want to become more confident, work on appearing more confident.
On this subject, a study cited by Science Direct said the following:
“The perception of our body and those feelings, which are associated with this image, greatly influence not only our self-concept but our self-esteem, too.“
It’s not just about hitting the gym, walking more confidently, and taking body language lessons. It’s about how you perceive yourself.
Some people don’t need to be in great shape to build confidence. Others, however, do. The main challenge resides in being honest with yourself.
Does your appearance foster or shatter your self-esteem? If so, why?
To boost your self-confidence organically, you need to ask the right questions and optimize your self-concept accordingly.
Find purpose in core activities
The next part of increasing your self-confidence is all about your daily activities. If you are stuck in a job you hate, it will be hard to use that professional environment as a confidence-building stepping stone. In that same vein, if you engage in habits that make you unhappy – like junk food or binge-watching TV shows, you’ll have a hard time becoming more confident.
That’s where you need to find purpose.
Whether it’s your job or your daily routine, you need to know why you are doing things regularly.
If your core activities have a purpose, you’ll become more confident over time. You’ll know that you are performing a sequence of habits because they adhere to your values – and help you advance toward your goals.
Look at all the things you do daily. Do you perform them on autopilot, or do you select them mindfully as part of a value-driven lifestyle?
If you want to give your self-confidence a boost, autopilot won’t cut it. Only activities that make you feel productive or add enjoyment and purpose to your life will have a genuine impact on your confidence.
Accept that risk is an inevitable part of life
Finally, the last killer way to increase your self-confidence concerns your approach toward risk.
“Risk” is an intriguing concept. Let’s take a jump into the investment world. In this context, Investopedia defines risk as:
“The chance that an outcome or investment’s actual gains will differ from an expected outcome or return.”
The definition might come from an investment standpoint, but it also applies to life in general: the actual outcome can always differ from the expected outcome.
No matter if you’re taking a new job, going to college, or starting a business, there is always a risk of failure. Nobody can predict the future, and risk is a natural part of life.
That’s why you need to control your approach toward risk if you want to become more confident.
In this regard, if you’re endlessly pondering what could happen, you’ll never be upbeat about your actions.
Don’t get me wrong. It’s not about negating the presence of risks. It’s about calculating the risks to the best of your abilities and making informed decisions.
Once you make decisions knowing the risks involved, your confidence will grow as a result of information. As such, you’ll realize that you acted after a thorough assessment. And this knowledge is the key to becoming more confident when making critical decisions.
This article was originally posted on Medium.
Useful links on 6 Killer Ways to Increase Your Self-Confidence Organically
- more in the section “Life”
- more under the topic “Mindset”
- read A Guide on How to Remove Negative Thoughts From Your Life
- read How to Set Priorities in Life
Don’t miss a beat!